The Brazen Burp
A Legendary Tavern in The City of Or
Nestled along the cobbled edge of Coalwalk Row, just beyond the Heartforge's residual warmth, stands The Brazen Burp—a famed tavern that has withstood riots, revolutions, and at least one minor planar misalignment. Revered by miners, mages, and misfits alike, it pulses with laughter, ale, and the kind of philosophy only possible after your third tankard.
Ambience & Appearance
Worn wooden beams cradle a low ceiling stained by time and smoke. The walls are cluttered with faded Flatstone Family campaign posters, rusted weapons, and dubious portraits of former regulars. A raised stage dominates the center-left, used for performances or last-minute brawls. A second-floor rickety balcony, known locally as the “Drunken Loft,” lets the bold drink dangerously close to the edge.
The entire structure leans slightly to the left—either due to decades of singing or a botched Density Calibrator test nearby.
Gundric "Gundy" Alebrow
Owner, barkeep, and quiet monarch of mischief, Gundy runs the place with a memory sharper than a dwarven battleaxe. Heavyset, bald, and ever-watchful, he speaks rarely but carries an uncanny sense of timing. Many believe he once worked with the Council of Or, but traded politics for pints.
The Rusty Pluckers
The tavern's infamous house band The Rusty Pluckers, composed of two half-orc brothers and a goblin fiddler with a twitch. Their chaotic melodies have been known to cause or quell fights, depending on how in tune they are. Their rendition of "Don't Trust a Troll with Your Teapot" is banned in five neighboring inns.
Notable Regulars
- Miss Terry – Tiefling bard, heartbreaker and harmony-bringer. Wields a lute and sarcasm with equal flair.
- Grimsa Ironfist – Elder dwarf, twice widowed, drinks only Heartfire Reserve and can arm-wrestle trolls.
- Harg & Pibble – Known for their drunken debates on the philosophical nature of doors, identity, and whether time itself is just a hiccup.
- The Quiet Lot – Mysterious, silent youths who always show up on Open Talent Nights, clap politely, and vanish.
Tavern Lore & Local Myths
The Founding
Some claim the tavern sprang into existence when a drunken wizard tried to conjure an ale mug that never empties. Instead, the spell supposedly birthed a tavern that only closes when Gundy nods.
The “Or” Theory
Locals insist that The City of Or earned its name from the infamous bar debate closer: “Is it truth… or?”
Dueling to Drinking
Built on the foundation of an old dueling hall, the Burp allegedly turned its violence into competitive drinking matches, forging peace through ale (and concussions).
Open Talent Night
Held every other moonrise, these chaotic performances are hosted by Miss Terry, backed by the Pluckers. Tales abound of spontaneous fame, lifelong humiliation, and one accidental summoning of a spectral chicken.
Most legendary night? When Gundy entered Harg & Pibble without their consent. Their seated, slurred debate on "the opposite of victory" won them first place—and a barrel of Brazen Brew they never remember claiming.
The Brazen Brew
Origins & Ingredients
The infamous Brazen Brew was first concocted in a moment of chaotic inspiration by a younger, wilder Bogrum the Booming during a particularly violent brawl. The drink’s origins lie in the legendary Battle of The Brazen Burp, where a night of chaos, fists, and flying chairs led to the accidental mixing of:
- Whiskey (for wisdom, ironically)
- Cider (for sweetness, deceptively)
- Gin (for madness, obviously)
- Stout beer (for fortitude, questionably)
- Animal blood (for reasons lost to history)
By the time the brawl ended, those still conscious raised their mugs in unity and discovered they had created a drink so potent it blurred the lines between friendship, bravery, and terrible decision-making.
Effects
- One mug: Temporary courage and impaired logic
- Two mugs: Compulsory toasts to imaginary friends
- Three mugs: Spontaneous song and possible divine audience
No one drinks a fourth. No one remembers drinking a fourth.
Reputation
Recognized by Tankard Trekkers as a Legendary Pint Post, the Brazen Burp is sacred ground for any adventurer who values a good drink, a strange tale, or both at once.
Wanderers from Triz Valley, the Glimmering Ashenburrow, and even a few Iridian have visited—some to drink, others to hear the whispers said to linger in the walls between sips.
Notes
The Brazen Burp remains a cornerstone of Or’s cultural identity, where laughter battles sorrow nightly, and no one questions why the walls occasionally hum in harmony with the Rusty Pluckers.
Raise your tankard. Just maybe not a third time.